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I DON"T HATE VALENTINTE"S BUT I DON"T LIKE IT EITHER,VALENTINE"S DAY IS FOR COUPLE"S WHO ARE IN LOVE,USED TO LOVE VALENTINE"S DAY BUT HURT TO MANY TIME"S SO I GUESS I DON"T LIKE VALENTINE"S DAY

Well, I'm a married female, and for me, Valentine's Day is pretty forgettable. I like to do something like dip strawberries into chocolate (more for my kids than my husband, who doesn't really love strawberries).

I had a friend several years ago who gave her husband the "silent treatment" because he didn't remember to buy her a dozen roses for Valentine's. The poor guy even got the roses after the fact, but his belated gesture wasn't good enough for my friend. Obviously it was a big deal to her. My husband and I were both astonished at her behavior. He has bought me roses occasionally over the years (usually more as a spur-of-the-moment surprise than for any special "day"), but, even though I think it's a nice gesture, I'd really prefer that he spend the money on something more durable, something we actually need.

I think if people love each other, they should show it every day of the year, not just on a certain day set aside for romance.

Valentine's is sort of like Groundhog Day, though, in that it was associated with the beginning of spring for many centuries. I think winter is technically half over on Feb. 2 (hence the importance of checking for signs of spring in agricultural societies). And there was an old superstition that the birds chose their mates on St. Valentine's Day (which is why Chaucer set his satiric poem The Parliament of Fowls on that day). I guess it is part of people's longing for spring as winter drags on. I can understand keeping it alive if it helps to brighten up the late winter for folks.

HI MURPH,YES YOU ARE RIGHT,THEY SHOULD SHOW IT EVERY DAY OFF THE YEAR,AND NOT JUST ON VALENTINE"S DAY,WELL SAID

Well, as I added above, I think Valentine's is a way to spark up the late winter season, when people are naturally growing impatient for spring. If folks want to make a little mini-holiday to brighten up their mood from the winter doldrums, go for it. But I think it is silly to put pressure on your sweetie to "perform" in one way or another. If people are getting their feelings hurt and getting into arguments about how they did/didn't observe the day, the purpose of it is defeated.

Yeah, that's amazing. I guess some people really do take it very seriously.

My husband gave me my engagement ring around Valentine's (wasn't quite on the day, IIRC, but close to it). Then the first year we were married, he gave me a gold necklace with a pendant that had a small diamond in it. I teased him and said, "You are going to make me expect gold and diamonds every Valentine's Day!" Of course, I never got anything remotely like that again on that day. But it was fine with me because to me, the day just isn't that big a deal.

OTOH, I can understand that woman's husband doing that if, like us, they had kids and just couldn't afford big gifts for each other around Christmas. There have certainly been years when we gave each other nothing for Christmas because we couldn't afford it after making Christmas for the kids. In those years, it made sense to postpone our own gift-giving to a later time, perhaps around Valentine's. (In our case, my husband can't wait for my birthday, because mine is three days before Christmas. The poor guy!)

My friend who gave her husband the "silent treatment" was born in Cuba. Though she doesn't remember Cuba, she grew up in a Spanish-speaking family. Maybe Valentine's Day is a bigger deal in their culture than in ours.